Monday, May 08, 2006

How Kaavya Viswanathan Got Rich, Got Sued, and Finally, Got on Bosey.

by the evilemperorzeb, who really does exist, hence proved.

Another dramatic twist in the wild life of Kaavya Viswanathan has seen one more lawsuit filed
against the poor little Harvard girl. And this time it’s a biggie.


In addition to the charges leveled by Megan McCafferty, Meg Cabot, Salman Rushdie and Salman Khan, there is now a whole new dimension being added to the story by… yes, The Oxford Press, who are claiming that Kaavya has lifted almost every single word from their best seller – The Oxford English Dictionary.

“The girl has absolutely no ethical sensibility. She has taken almost everything from our book. We know they don’t teach much over there but this is just not cricket.” yelled an unruly bar maid somewhere in Britain.

“Plagiarism is defined in the dictionary as ‘the act or instance of plagiarizing’, and since this such an instance is, she must guilty is be”, yelled an equally unruly Salman Khan mixing up his ignorance of both books with really bad yoda-ism to produce that masterpiece.

“He is just trying to make a fast buck”, punned an unsuspecting Indrabeer, when suddenly offered the third quote on this issue.

Meanwhile, Harvard, the university without its own dictionary, and Merriam Webster’s, the dictionary without its own university, have both denounced this lawsuit as a cheap attempt by a non-American institution to try and copy American legal behaviour. There are reports that their lawyers are attempting to work together and back-sue The Oxford Press for plagiaristic suing.

For Kaavya however, the future looks bleak. The Oxford Dictionary has a total of 59 Million words. She has already used up her ‘double A for luck’ option. And renowned photographer S.U Saravannakumar does not think she looks particularly hot.

In fact the future looks bleak for several others as well. Rumour has it that Sue Susudio, an hitherto unknown housewife on a park bench somewhere in somewhere, is attempting to sue everyone who has ever sued anyone for demeaning the word ‘Sue’… But that’s another story.